Singer Mindset Talk: How to Build Confidence From the Inside Out


By Cari Cole

Confidence is a tricky thing. It’s inside out, not outside in.

Often times, we think that confidence comes from external things. Like if we just had a killer voice or music then we’d be confident. But confidence is an inside game.

Because the truth is, no matter how you feel on the outside, if you are insecure on the inside, your exterior will never make up for your internal feelings.

Given that most artists are born insecure (it’s a part of what makes them great artists is their sensitivity), then how do you not let your frail self confidence not destroy or self-sabotage your career?

You don’t. You build another voice, one that’s stronger.

You’re probably never going to get rid of the negative self deprecating voices. Sigh. They have a habit of lurking around in dark corners and attacking at the least opportune times.

BUT — you can build a stronger one that drowns them out.

Self talk. You can talk yourself off the cliff, down from the ledge, and onto safe ground — if you practice it. And the more you practice, the stronger that voice gets.

One of my beloved students in my Artist Success Circle Music Mastermind told us a story last week of how she did just that — gave herself a pep talk in the face of a seeming familiar downward spiral kind of situation.

She is trying to get more exposure and get out there with her music. So she is going for things that usually scare her. She applied for a songwriting contest in her town. She’s been working on her craft hard for the past 2 years with my company, writing with our songwriting team, working her artistry to the bone. She’s ready to come out of her cave. But she still is shaking in her boots — guys — it’s normal. No matter how good your music is, there is always doubt, especially when those negative voices are loud.

To her amazement, she placed as a contender. And while it felt good, it brought up all of those old doubts. Doubts of “not being good enough.” And worse, fears of being exposed and rejected, and even worse, of publically losing. Sound familiar?

But she decided to talk herself off that ledge. Using positive self talk, she told herself that she was worthy — for a change. She infused her mind and being with positive thoughts, shot herself up with a little badass bravery and courage. She was tired of listening to the old tapes. And even though she didn’t win the final contest, something miraculous happened. She realized that it didn’t matter anymore – because she had material that she believed in, that she would fight for (the focus of our methodology.) She suddenly she realized that it didn’t even matter whether she won, because she knew where she was going. She knew what she had accomplished and that regardless of the feedback from external circumstances, she was on her way. #Priceless.

That’s what it’s all about. Making the music that YOU want to hear. Fighting for that. With every breath you have. And then suddenly, you are standing in the world with more worth. You have an inner radiance. You start to build this inner confidence, one that nothing or no one can take away from you ;).

Yep. You can have this. It’s what we teach all of the artists we work with. How to build a catalog of work to fight for. How to make the music of their lives. How to believe in themselves. How to be themselves in a world that tells you to be everything but. That is what we believe makes great music, great artists. Ones that change the world ;).

 


Share this post

Categories

Hi, I’m Cari Cole.

You’ve got talent, but you want to become great at it. You’re in the right place! My mission is to help you refine your unique artist vision to bring to the world.

About Cari Cole

Cari Cole is the CEO / Founder of caricole.com and CCVM: Label Without Walls. She is a Holistic Vocal Coach, Artist Development Expert, A&R Director, and Songwriter based in New York City helping artists for the past 38 years. She is a mentor for Women in Music and The Association of Independent Music Publishers.

Her latest venture, CCVM a label services company, provides artists with a seamless path from creation to completion. After 30+ years of observing the overwhelm and challenges that artists face, Cari pulled together the best top creative professionals and designed a new approach to supporting our artists.

Disclaimer:
The information provided on Cari Cole's website is informational only and should not be used for diagnosing or treating a health problem or disease. Those seeking personal medical advice should consult with a licensed physician. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health provider regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on Cari Cole's website. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency room immediately.

Worried About Losing Your
Voice During a Performance?

In a few minutes you'll learn:

  • Where your voice rates on the vocal health scale
  • How to realign your voice and regain vocal health
  • How to stay healthy and vocally fit throughout your career

Get Your Free Vocal Health Quiz

A Gift from Holistic Vocal Coach, Cari Cole.

Assess your vocal health + get my proven techniques and holistic remedies to support your vocal health.

INSTANT ACCESS

FREE DAY TRIAL

FREE DAY TRIAL

... I’ll show you how to manifest your music and get on track to the career of your dreams.

Kickstart your craft + career with FREE access to my Step Up to the Spotlight Artist Development Program

30 Videos      30+ Worksheets      52 Week Artist Plan

INSTANT ACCESS

FREE DAY TRIAL

FREE DAY TRIAL

... I’ll show you how to manifest your music and get on track to the career of your dreams.

Kickstart your craft + career with FREE access to my Step Up to the Spotlight Artist Development Program

30 Videos      30+ Worksheets      52 Week Artist Plan

Announcing a brand new experience...

Cari Signature_White

Presents:

VOCAL PERFORMANCE CIRCLE

8 weeks to your best performance, ever.

Ease. Execution. Excellence.

Cari Cole Vocal Coach Signature

free vocal workshop

The Power of the
Singing Voice

Thursday, May 4th at 2:30pm ET
*Limited seats available

Held LIVE on

Untitled design (3)

WORLD VOICE DAY

SAVe up to

50% OFF

ENDS APRIL 17!

Love yourself with a special gift...

VALENTINE’S DAY

SAVE UP TO

30% Off

ENDS FEBRUARY 15!

CCVM
Monthly Musician

MEMBERSHIP

CCVM

VOCAL
EXERCISES

CCVM

PROGRAMS

with Cari Cole

CCVM

PRIVATE
SESSIONS

with Cari Cole

Cari Cole Vocal Coach Signature
Cari Signature_White

Black Friday

SAVE UP TO

50% OFF

ENDS NOVEMBER 28!

CCVM
Monthly Musician

MEMBERSHIP

CCVM

VOCAL
EXERCISES

CCVM

PROGRAMS

with Cari Cole

CCVM

PRIVATE
SESSIONS

with Cari Cole

Back by popular demand!

Cari Cole Presents:

VOCAL FREEDOM CIRCLE

20 minutes a day.
3 months.
Your best voice ever.

*Program starts February 7 - April 10, 2024

By continuing to use the site, you agree to the use of cookies in accordance with our Privacy Policy and Terms & Conditions