Why Can’t You Get It Right? (for once in your life…)

by Cari Cole

Ever hear that voice in your head? “When are you going to get it right?” followed by a “for once in your life”…

Probably about a million times if you are over 21.

It’s not your fault, it’s one of those conditioned responses that we are taught from early on — just one-of-those-things we say to ourselves. But it’s not the voice you want to hear in your ear – for psychological wellness reasons, but that’s another article. Today I want to talk about how “getting it right” is not so good for Creative Types, like me and you.

If you are anything like the artists I work with, myself included, you probably work pretty hard at “getting it right”. Whatever your bigger goals are, I’m pretty sure you’re pretty driven to “get it right.” Most of us are.

You want to “get it right,” “do it right,” and “have it turn out right.”

But in the domain of being an artist, “getting it right” doesn’t really work.

You’re probably wondering what the heck I’m talking about – right?

Well, as it turns out, “getting it right” is actually more for the left-brain dominant type – the mechanic, the accountant, the math whiz, and less for the right creative brain dominant artist.

You see, creativity is not linear – it doesn’t show up in order. Like songwriting. You can’t sit down to write a song and expect the verse and the pre-chorus, chorus and bridge to all come in order (and if you do you might want to rethink that). Because you might write the second verse first (without knowing it at until you write the second one and realize it is the first) or you might write what you think is a chorus and it’s really the verse, or the other way around. And if you are not open to that you’ll miss your own creativity trying to show up for you.

Your career is like that too. Things won’t show up in order exactly. An opportunity may come your way before you are ready – or it may come at a bad time when you are leaving town or going on a business trip. And if you don’t know yourself and know your course, you’ll say yes at the wrong times.

That’s why being aware of where you are on your journey is so important – and critical to progress.

I love this picture that’s been plastered on so many FB walls lately — it so perfectly represents what I mean.

I call it Organized Chaos. Non-linear organized chaos.

And there’s something too about “getting it right” that seals the lid on creativity. By nature, the act of “getting it right” makes you try too hard, over-reach, and be too self-conscious. And let’s face it, it doesn’t look good up in lights. It comes across as trying too hard because you want to “get it right”, be perfect. Why? So you won’t be criticized? But by its very nature, you won’t be in your element, free and clear of your own judgment, so what comes out of you but self-consciousness, insecurity. I know, I’ve been there.

Not only that, but probably no one will tell you that unless you have one of those friends who tells you when you have spinach in your teeth or too much makeup on – (or a coach like me) and even then there’s a limit to what you can comment on when it’s a matter of style or opinion. That’s why I tell my students the hard stuff. I tell them in a non-judgmental way so it is useful information to them. Because I know they need that information to better themselves. You can tell almost anyone almost anything if you know how to say it.

So here are my seven tips to mastering the flow, while you’re working your steps, and climbing the ladder – just know it won’t be straight up!

Seven Tips to Mastering the Flow of Organized Chaos

1. Be Open. Stay open-minded, be flexible. Steps don’t necessarily come in order.
2. Be Aware. Be aware of where you are on your journey so you can respond appropriately.
3. Think First, React Second. Think through everything you say, write (email) and do. Everything is an opportunity, what kind of energy are you feeding into the stream?
4. Be a Solution-finder, not a Victim of your Problems. There are always problems and challenges. When one arises, look for a solution – it won’t magically appear – you have to look for it. Schedule brain dumps and brainstorming time.
5. Be Resilient – Crap happens. Process it and bounce back quickly. A sudden downturn is a part of the squiggly line to success ;).
6. Let Go Often. Sometimes your brain will stay in lockdown when it needs to release its hold. Don’t worry if things don’t work out as you planned, it’s all part of the flow.
7. Stay Positive. Every now and again you’ll have to give yourself a pep talk – you can do it or find someone you trust to give you one (btw – meditating 5 minutes a day or doing Louise Hay’s positive talk (affirmations) from her book “You Can Live An Exceptional Life” is great brain medicine.

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